Wednesday, November 27, 2013


Excuse my super cynical generalisation, but the Vatican must be confused as hell. On one hand, they can now claim Ian Watkins as a convert to kiddy-fiddling and on the other, there goes the cash cow. Ethical conundrum...

Ok, here's where I set the record straight. I do not mean to belittle the situation and especially the victims of these alleged crimes. Look how I used "alleged" as if I work for the SABC. But since the NSA is more than likely going to report me for sharing pictures of Nkandla, the Not-Compound, I had better cover my tracks. What this man admitted to doing (even if only in its capacity as "attempted") is so depraved that it doesn't even bear contemplation. What that other hunter chick (see? last week's news already...) did was rotten and appalling. But legal. What this guy, and the so-called ("alleged") mothers of these children did is so far beyond the pale as to be almost inconceivable. MOTHERS! Anyway, I am at a loss for words. I don't care what happens to him. There is nothing on this earth, as incalculably cruel as humankind has shown itself to be, that could be tortuous enough to exact any level of vengeance. Having said that, I disagree with all the citizens of internetland calling (or hoping) for his rape in prison. As it is sickening to have attempted to subject his victims to such a foul and vicious act, so, ultimately, it is to wish such a fate upon him...

Which brings us to the Department of Basic Education. Who, in their infinite genius, after finally delivering schoolbooks to some learners, included in a matric exam a question requiring scholars to describe how they would portray a rape scene using only a loaf of bread and a broomstick as props. WHAT!?!?! The reference is from a play by Lara Foot called Tsephang, which I am sure, in context, is a work of artistic integrity and probably morally profound. But to cull a portion and use only that to conjure up a question so criminally insensitive is a new level of fucking stupid. Not to mention just another dagger to the heart of victims of this crime and those that campaign to curb its proliferation in our "alleged" society. We're already desensitised, don't make it worse, you utter dumbfucks! How can we, as concerned citizens, allow these fucking buffoons to inform and educate our youth?

Oh yes, and then there's the protest march organised by ANC dissidents planned for Friday in Cape Town. They applied for a permit to walk from The Grand Parade to Parliament so they could pass on a note. The last time, this peaceful activity included some gentle assault, some considerate theft and some delicate damage to property. So their request was denied. So, obviously, building on the principles of our wonderful democracy, they said "Fuck you! We're gonna do it anyway. Try not to be in pooh-flinging range come Friday." Most of my friends will simply fuck off and have a long weekend, outraged and incensed by televised reports, but I feel for the illegal Somali immigrants who can't afford to stall their trading for a day. Houdja Lakem Apples and Haile El Igal Cigarettes are going to have a rough day...

The good news? The good news is that I had an experience last night that, had you informed my 20 year old self of it, I would never have believed you. No, not finally getting laid... Let's just say I played a guitar and some other people played some other instruments. It was glorious. Or at least, it will be.

NGDG: I'm in the parking lot and see four big black dudes in shades and suits besides a black Bentley, Range Rover and Lexus with personalised plates. I crouch, draw my finger and go pew pew. No wonder they didn't have a sense of humour. They never had a chance against my superior marksmanship.

Spread The Love. Help Thwart Rape Culture.

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