Friday, November 22, 2013


Who says your money isn't earning compound interest?

Or however you choose to pronounce it...

Apparently everyone misunderstood the parliamentary ban on publishing pictures of our nation's most shameful leader's ostentatious abode. As long as you don't Zuma in on the specifics with your big Melissa Bachmann telescopic lens, inadvertently causing severe breaches in security, then all is well and you may show these pictures to anyone on the internet who wants to feel morally outraged.

This guy Shane Janse van Rensburg probably feels all sorts of injustice has been heaped upon him. He of the terribly trite blog (I apologise - I should know better than giving him any more online traction) who recently rose to interwebnet superstardom for being a bigoted dickhole and inflaming opinion against people who were here long before my forefathers settled in this Eden. Not only were his statements (claimed as fact) grossly inaccurate and purposely derogatory and heinously racist, but his tortured abuse of my beloved mother tongue almost coaxed me to leave a comment, something to which I am particularly averse. Anyway, this Steve Hofmeyr wannabe got schooled good and proper by a well articulated and thoroughly dignified (and researched) response from a guy called Brian E Ebden. Alas, I can bet you anything you like the vast majority of his supporters will see it as nothing more than an attack on their moral indignation, and dare I say it, their sovereign stipulation of "no flag, no country!"

Anyway, I don't live in South Africa. Obviously. I remain blissfully unaware of the mass genocide inflicted on every single white farmer in the country. I live in Cape Town, and on a Friday afternoon in Cape Town - especially in THIS weather - it's beer o'clock.

[*Just to avoid any confusion, I am being a little facetious and sympathise with anyone who has suffered bereavement at the hands of violent criminals in this country. And by anyone, I mean white people AND black people. I'm sick to death of people proudly presenting skewed statistics like the first oke in the class who got pubes.]

Perhaps we should try concentrating on the common enemy. The fat cat bastards who pillage the coffers I so almost honestly inflate every month. They are the motherfuckers that deserve our unrelenting vitriol. Denying our children decent education, our sick proper medical care, our hungry nourishment, and our destitute any form of recourse are the real crimes in this land. Everything else is merely an indication that something is very wrong and that shit gathers momentum on its way down.

But having said all that, my personal (and perennial) favourite axe to grind is how the masses simply accept the kak, manufactured schlock otherwise referred to as popular music. It brings me to my knees and my body shakes uncontrollably with wretched weeping when I think of how far beyond the pale it has been allowed to get. We can only recommend and administer the antidote in small doses...
Tomorrow the real deal is brought to the V&A Waterfront Pavilion in the form of Long Time Citizen, a band you do not want to underestimate. So get on down, grab a pint and then a seat, and enjoy some true quality for a change.
Then if your thirst for authentic entertainment has still to be quenched (highly doubtful) Saturday night boasts the comeback of all comebacks. Underworld (the same people that brought you all those wonderful goth gatherings in and around Cape Town for so many years) is back! If you recall the amazing parties at the Crypt and the like, you dare not miss this ICONS PARTY! Hosted at the newly renovated Decodance Underworld, this is an event that is sure to have you dancing until well past the witching hour...

Anyway, like No Friends said "Sun, wash over me..."
It's weekend.

NGDG: I'm an optimist. I see a better world on the horizon free of war, poverty and crime. That's the perfect time to enter the arms trade and become rich as hell.

Spread The Love. "We Gather Thorns For Flowers"

1 comment:

  1. "Who says your money isn't earning compound interest?" Best caption ever. Sir, you win the internet today.