Monday, December 9, 2013


I'm often accused of using boobs to increase traffic on these hallowed pages.

I'm no political analyst. I just calls 'em like I sees 'em. And what's going down in the wake of Madiba's death is as tragic as it is contemptible. The vultures have gathered en masse to pick clean the bones of a great legacy. Where once, as a nation, we had a father figure, we are now left with a lecherous uncle that forces you to fiddle with him in the bathtub. The parasites are clamouring for a piece of the action and the sickening saccharine insincerity flowing from every set of lips that still draws breath makes me want to shoot myself through the ears and then the eyes.

Other than that, I had an awesome weekend, thank you.

Kick ass rock'n'roll, both on and off the stage, were the order of the day at Kuduchild's EP Launch at Ragazzi. It was hot and sweaty - just the way it should be - as the capacity crowd was treated to a night of seriously groovy tunes. Once the openers (the alluring Galactidactyl and the immense Dirt Boxes) had swept the crowd up into a heaving frenzy, Kuduchild took to the stage with their trademark stompin' brand of desert rock and rocked the SHIT out of an excitable and very receptive crowd. No one was spared as they "gave it horns" only the boys from Kuduchild know how to do, a truly memorable and mammoth show. Onward and upward as these guys blaze a trail through the dusty heartland of SA's burgeoning music scene and into our collective conscience.
There was even a sideshow, inside and out. Apparently there had been work functions before the show that day, the effects of which were still being felt by some of the more rambunctious patrons... Tarty Farty Tequila Party and UpSideDownGirl, I'm looking at you!

And then on to the main event. Sunday marked the union of two of our closest friends, the ViKing and his bride, Sheik Yerbouti. The only thing more beautiful than the stunning setting was the ceremony itself - one that included air punches and a plastic monkey. The words were heartfelt and beautiful. The bride and groom clearly could hardly contain their excitement - infectious to say the least! Everything was as it should have been on their special day. The speeches, the food, the music (a fond subject at weddings) and the family and friends all made for a wonderful occasion. We, as guests sharing this auspicious day, could not have hoped for a more perfect wedding - as I'm sure it will be forever in their hearts and memories. Congratulations, you two! May your future be forever blessed.

Which brings me to the most expensive little bag of potatoes ever purchased. My little sister (and vastly superior half of the DSW) has a long held theory on potatoes. Apparently our home grown variety doesn't come close to the quality of its Irish counterpart when it comes to mash. I politely disagree.
Anyway, making my way to Canal Walk to take advantage of a particular gift buying opportunity, I was at once filled with the holiday spirit of giving and the insurmountable dread of having to survive a trip to a mall in the grips of Yuletide fever. Usually I plan it pretty well and manage to get in and out before being overwhelmed by a compulsion to commit genocide.
The thing I was after was sold out...
So in order to make my trip worthwhile, I bought the one thing I needed for dinner. A small packet of potatoes. Walking back to the car as quickly as I could it dawned on me that the parking cost more then the little bag of tubers in my hand and that I had effectively just wasted an hour of my life and paid more than double for something that - upon getting home and finding potatoes in the cupboard ANYWAY - turns our I didn't need. Online shopping, here I come.

Anyway, here's to a short week! I have taken the liberty (precaution) of taking off a few days so that I may prepare for and recover from the 2 gigs I have coming up later this week. The all important SUBVERS launch showcase at Mercury is on Wednesday, followed by the sumptuous Symphonaire Infernus II on Friday at ROAR. Hope to see one and all there!

It's even made the press. If you haven't had enough of my opinions yet, Metal4Africa asked us some questions...

And last but by no means least, a huge HAPPY BIRTHDAY to two extraordinary people. Biffy, wish you were here. Miss you. And Charles - hope you have an awesome one, mate.

NGDG: Noah. The Movie. Relax, it's Aronofsky. It has Emma Watson in it. Possibly two of her if I remember the story right. It's every guy's threesome fantasy.

Spread The Love. 'Tis The Seasoning.

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