Tuesday, May 13, 2014


The Hot Girlfriend has a thing for superhero costumes.

That's not her. The Hot Girlfriend is waaaay hotter than the slapper in that picture. Honest! Also, she gave me a guitar, which I doubt anyone else can say. I'll be using that guitar tomorrow, when I melt your faces off playing some well-known, beloved tracks from my childhood. Trips down mammary lane, if you will. A tit of the hat to nostalgia and a fantastically misspent youth. Ah, I remember the days - fondly if not vividly. I loved the music and the night life and the carefree attitude with which we embraced it all! Not so much the universal shunning from the opposite sex. 

Maar kyk hoe lyk hy nou!

Must be because - out of desperation to impress girls - I relented and finally bought a guitar. Intent on mastering this new instrument that would ultimately guarantee me some action, I managed only to piss my parents off with the off-key, demonic hell-shrieks tearing from my speakers. Luckily I figured out that if you surround yourself with competent musicians and hide behind the smoke and mirrors of long hair and a flashy guitar, half the battle's won!

Nevertheless, I need to arrive at some sort of point on this here post, otherwise I could just as well have written "Look at the tits on that!" and have left it there. But I strive to be a little less vacuous than the Chive. (The jury is still out on the correct pronunciation.) So here it is. Despite my apparent lack of technical wizardry, I have been honoured with an invitation to share the stage with some of our music scene's most low-down-'n'-dirty dignitaries. Check it out:

Anton Marshall has for better or for worse been allowed to host a 'Waxing Lyrical' event at Mercury tomorrow night. So what does he do - he invites a whole mess of musos to collaborate on a whole mess of classic tunes and all of a sudden, Anton Marshall And Frenz brings you a night of aural sex (Greg Donnelly came up with that, not me)...

So if, like me, you grew up wistfully wiling your teenage years away in record stores, pawing at records you couldn't really afford, and frequenting horrific little dirty dives at night, trying your awkward best to impress the aloof goth goddess on the dancefloor, then pull in! Never in your lifetime did you imagine you'd see songs by Ministry or Swans played on a stage... in front of you... Now's your (my guess would be one and only) chance! So saunter on over to Mercury Live tomorrow night for a truly memorable night - see you there!

I'll be the guy having the fucking time of his life up on the stage!

NGDG: No wonder people vote for the same parties. It's like going into a new restaurant, seeing all these weird dishes with cilantro and sundried tomato, and saying 'nah, just a cheeseburger please.'

Spread The Love. The Miracle Of Love.

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