Wednesday, August 7, 2013

EVERYTHING IS VIRTUAL AND WE LIVE ONLINE.


Wow! How did I miss 2 days? You guys must have been frantic with worry!

*Tumbleweed...*

Actually, I'm quite disappointed no one sent for the National Guard, or whichever local equivalent would have bungled the search horribly, but at least amusingly. Fuck, even just Lassie would have done. Except I wasn't in a well and my name isn't Timmy.

The truth, dear reader, is that I haven't had much on which to report or muse. I have been enjoying my nice content little life. Nothing extraordinary has happened. Moaning over the contents of the news has surely become old hat by now. So I decided to restrict my vowel vomit to only those times when I have something of value to contribute to your mundane existences. Except for today. Today's excuse is I'm fucking bored at work. Ok, I know some smart arse is going to pipe up "Hey, why don't you do some work, then?" You know what... Fuck off.

It's probably the weather (another white hot topic that never seems to bore the tears out of the public) being all wintery and shitty. I've successfully powered down into genuine hibernation mode. Beer has been substituted with red wine and hot chocolate. Well, the red wine was also always there, but it sounds better the first way, ok? Soups have taken over from salads, etc. Which brings me to the weekend that passed like a ghost train in the night in the middle of the Karoo - virtually unnoticed. For the most part I stayed indoors. Except for football on Friday. And braaing on Saturday.

Oh what a braai. The neighbours were rather good sports. I had 3 Banshees as guests. The Hot Girlfriend, Tarty Farty Tequila Party and Slappy combined to a convincing chorus of demonic proportions. Imagine Satan's nails dragged across a spectral chalk board - the screeching hell sound magnified to ear-splitting volumes... Just add wine.

I was left in peace to braai enough meat for a small battalion of meat eaters - whoohoo! Leftovers for the entire week! Life is kak.

Tomorrow I'll probably muse about the Deftones concert and how I predict a bad turn out. I really hope not, but being the student of social media that I am, things don't look all that rosy. I say student. I mean whore.
Which reminds me, I have to learn how to take a selfie...

NGDG: Autoreply: I am out of the office.

I wish.

Spread The Love. Not The Rockets. Skates, Maybe...

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