Thursday, October 11, 2012


The other McFlurry...

Before your sordid little minds even go there, no, I am not sitting in the office with my lower half doing a poor imitation of a McFlurry. That would be - other than mildly amusing and uncomfortably sticky - disgusting. My colleague would probably also not be too thrilled. Not to mention the confectionery crack syndrome - something I might regret when taking my exercise later...

No, dear gentle reader, I am referring to the latest new gadget in my life. My infinitely more tech savvy sibling (and the charismatic half of the DSW) was kind enough to provide me with yet another hand-me-down cellular telephone. We have now reached a stage where this one is a touch screen smart phone, or close enough. Suffice it to say that this lowly tech-tard is feeling rather spiffy right now - all cool 'n' shit! Also, because I have been making do with base models up until now because this option has furnished my house. Game deals - how I love you!

So now I'm attempting to teach myself how to use this thing. I feel like my Mom, who still insists on smsing in caps because she can't get the hang of changing font specs mid message. It looks cool though! I can now also do all that swipey, sweepy, pinchy, pokey screen greasing everyone else does...

And speaking of burgers, last night's Dinner Club Church thing was the fourth time in 5 days I'd eaten a burger of some description. I'm burgered up. Klaar. Finished. Overs-kadovers. This would be funny if it weren't so tragic, given my family's close ties to this particular style of sammitch. Clearly from the wrong side of the tracks, if things were different I could have been an Earl. My name is - for better or for worse - something else.

What else can I tell you. Oh yes, I made an entire piece of furniture yesterday after work. Well, when I say made, what I really mean is "cut a perfectly good existing piece in two and sand and stain it". Still, I'm quite chuffed with my handiwork. A phrase most honest men would admit to, methinks. It was a desk and is now some sort of utility table for the passage. Everyone always needs a place to chuck their keys and sunglasses. Also, it has drawers. For all the trifling little trinkets of crap we are too lazy to throw away. See, perfect!

And as soon as I post this (no doubt as you're reading it right now) I'll be sauntering along the aisles of Fruit & Veg City purchasing as much lamb as my trolley-basket-wagon can hold. I may even buy a piece of fruit. No veg, though. That would just be too much!
Whist I am doing this I intend glancing at my new touch screen smart phone constantly in case I missed an sms conveying earth shattering news. Or life changing status updates. One must, when one is in Rome...

And tonight we make history, but more on that when bags become less constrictive and cats allow themselves to operate under instruction.

Coincidentally, Tarty Farty Tequila Party does not share my current culinary caution.

NGDG: Joseph Gordon Levitt has been dumped onscreen by so many women, the only way he could ever rebuild his self-esteem was to become a superhero. He chose the only one, Robin, who's probably still a virgin.

Spread The Love. It's In The Air. Like Germs.

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