Wednesday, December 7, 2011

COMPLAINTS DEPARTMENT



Things I don't like:


  1. Jack Parow is allowed to fuck, and impregnate, Jenna Pietersen.

  2. A colony of necromantic badgers has taken up residence in my mouth and are currently doing a homeless hobo naked version of a pornographic nativity play.

  3. Everything hurts.

  4. The glory-bound Team Burger King was cheated out of winning at last night's LMG Pub Quiz. I smell a conspiratorial rat.

  5. People moan too much when they are offered a variety of entertainment. "You can't please all the people all the time..."

  6. It's raining. In Cape Town. In December.

  7. The fact that I'm actually moaning makes me no better than all the moaning, suburban, entitled little bastards I'm moaning about.

  8. I don't have 'The Cure - Reflections' in my grubby paws yet.

  9. Every time I am asked to compile a wish list for potential gifts, I end up only being able to remember things so rare and exotic that I know no one will ever be able to find them.

  10. I hate it when I am restricted from buying my friends and family Christmas gifts.

  11. Have I mentioned the hangover?

  12. And the rather disappointing 4th place finish at Pub Quiz? (I must add how wonderfully received were the 5 questions I presented.)

  13. Or the fact that we had such a good time despite that, that I can't remember the latter portion of the evening, leaving, being driven home or entering my house?

  14. I am very, very disappointed that the story of the tattoo artist who tattooed a pile of steaming pooh on his (ex)chick's back is a hoax.

  15. I am pissed off that the Audi A5 is beyond my financial grasp.

Things I like:


  1. My new guitar stand.

  2. My girlfriend.

  3. There's a good chance that Fetish will be playing 2 shows in Cape Town. Watch this space...

  4. Die Vegas Show. It's gonna be on MK soon. Check it out.

  5. The new Terminatryx Remyx v1.0 album.

  6. Having mastered basic potty training at a reasonable age.



And on that rather disappointing note, I bid you farewell for another day, safely far enough away from my drivelly drivel.



NGDG: "Why do people quote the classics but read the trash? If one sentence resonates with you, imagine what an entire chapter will do. Yes, let's not get ahead of ourselves here."

Spread The Love. In A Quiet Dark Place For Preference.

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