Thursday, December 22, 2011


Another year down the toilet. What, if anything, did YOU achieve? Did you contribute in a positive manner to your surroundings or your fellow human beings? Or did you just sit and glower at the world via FaceBoobs and make jaundiced comments designed to display your aloof coolness, when all they did was show what a socially awkward wanker you are?

Not me. I sat and made derisive comments on FaceBoobs all year purely for YOUR entertainment. Everyone already knows what an utterly useless wanker I am.

I got some things right this year though:

  1. I got to see Rammstein, drugged up to the teary eyeballs, barely able to stand up straight, with my best mates.

  2. I successfully managed to keep the Good Ship McArb afloat through some choppy personal waters and it's a good thing I did. The Hot Girlfriend was worth the wait.

  3. I am almost fully transmogrified into a nifty hybrid of Martha Stewart and Keith Kirsten. This domestic goddess has perfected the art of conjuring culinary delights AND has green fingers - good for gardening.

  4. Team Burger King did us all proud with their perma-podium finishes. Whilst we never actually won, we were certainly a highlight and "coulda been a contender" at the LMG Pub Quiz nights.

  5. I did the inaugural Tutus 'n' Tiaras run (my eternal gratitude for everyone's assistance and support). Watch this space for more information soon. We're organising an event to benefit animal welfare. McCall, you are loved, missed and the inspiration for this wonderful initiative.

  6. I played my first full length gig in a long time, storming the stage at Mercury with my fellow miscreant in Axxon.

  7. I instituted a daily dof of the cap to the inspirational Neal Goldwyer, the King Of The Quip. Catch the latest instalment of his Daily Gems at the bottom of this post.

  8. I made you look, I made you poep...

Notable achievements by those near and dear:

  1. Tarty Farty Tequila Party managed to move homes without a complete break down. And the new place is rad!

  2. Rose Thorn got to see her all time greatest idol, Tori Amos.

  3. TDB managed a blog post.

  4. Various other people got hitched and/or had children.

Also, since this will be my final post of the year, let me take this opportunity to remind one and all of the superawesome live music event which will be ringing in the New Year. Rock The River, with it's stellar line up of local acts, is set to be THE party to be at, no question! I will be performing on the night of the 31st with the other crazed loons of AXXON, delivering a devilishly delightful set of In-Your-Face Industial. There will be lots of stompin' and hollerin'. Afterwards, when I am allowed to have a little drinkie, there will probably be more stompin' and hollerin'...

And on a more sombre note, today marks the anniversary of the passing of Joe Strummer - RIP you should have stayed, not gone.

And so, dear friends and readers, we come to the end of our journey together for the year. I'll be happily rid of you bastards for this last week, not having any interwebnets 'n' all, sunning my lanky ass in various stages of inebriated holidaying. Have a fun, safe festive season full of love and cheer and hopefully a few naughty sexual favours. 'Til New Years!

And for fuck's sake, do NOT drink and drive!

NGDG: "There's a venerable Scottish tradition of putting one's house in order ahead of the new year so all bodes well. My hanging garden replete with downlights is that final step in putting mine in order. Just waiting for the paint to dry to complete installation."

Spread The Love. In Your Saucy Little Elf Suit... Happy Holidays!