Friday, February 22, 2013

SICK. SICK. SICK.

Can't believe no one has meme'd this pic yet...

We're a lynch mob of bloodthirsty villagers baying for justice... "She's a witch! Burn her!" Like the famous Monty Python skit in the movie The Quest For The Holy Grail, South Africa, THIS IS YOU!!!
Mob rules! Incited to riot. Looting and pillaging over the fibre optic cables. Picking clean the bones of those not yet even duly tried. And in the course of your daily little lives losing sight of the big picture. The important things. And discarding the plight of the faceless millions who suffer without the obtrusive glare of the cameras in their faces. Ah hell, even those that did. How quickly you've hopped from the travesty of Anene Booysen to something juicier.

And with that, I will refrain from saying any more. The access to news we enjoy as a result of The Information Age has rendered our lives obsolete and we are forced to live vicariously through the trials (literally) and tribulations of those that either excel or repulse. Happy now?

It's Friday, people! And you know what that means, dontcha! IRREVERENCE in bucket loads. Unfortunately I have nothing particularly irreverent for right now, but if you allow me to sit here in my tidy whiteys long enough I'm sure something will come up. If you'd like, you may now picture this glorious apparition in your mind's eye.

I'm going away for the weekend. With the Hot Girlfriend. Leaving all you rotten rotters to fend for yourselves. We're going to enjoy the seclusion of a weekend away and the celebration of a wedding. I dig going to weddings, even more so the weddings of other people. And if I'm a "Plus One" so much the better. I can engage in small talk without touching on real life issues that pervade the conversations you share with those close to you. No concerns, no pressure. You can even make up a glamorous career if you really want to - and believe me it's probably preferable to laboriously explaining to the uninitiated what exactly it is I do for a living. My good friend JDP used to describe my job as "surfing porn and drinking beer". Accurate in that I deal with a similar number of vaginas, I suppose. Here's an interesting fact, talking of vaginas: Chris Brown recorded a version of the classic 'Try A Little Tenderness' in 2007. Ah! The fun facts that I get to pick up on in the course of a day's work...

I hope you all enjoy your weekends. Engrossed in the saga that's woven around the tragic death of a young woman and the unfortunate/despicable actions of a fallen icon. For YOUR entertainment.

Fuck.

NGDG: First, with a razor blade, carefully remove the 'dog' sticker from your enemy's 'My Family' decal. Kidnap dog. Rehome dog with nice family (obviously - you're not a complete dick). Next, remove 'child' sticker. Do nothing ever. Win.

Diabolical genius.

Spread The Love. Irreverently, If She'll Allow You...

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