Tuesday, July 2, 2013


"Let me hear you SCREAM!"

I have many theories. Like why they install air-blowey-dryers in public toilets. Not because they're more hygienic. And certainly not so that Madonna can dry her pits, no. It's so that the collection of individuals sitting timidly in the cubicles, trying to pass for mice, can let loose the bowel barrage under cover of hand dryer noise blast. People are essentially shy...

I also have a theory about conspiracy theorists. Convenient, hey? All those people breaking down and dissecting the mainstream media, claiming that we're being fed easily digested "news" so that we may remain subjugated, must also question their side of the story. It is, after all, intrinsic to their argument.
It's a classic red pill/blue pill scenario...

I will always question those who so vociferously try to get their point across. There's usually some sort of middle ground. Let's look at an example:
America. Land of the brave. Land of the free. If you ask me, it's land of the obese fatheads. My apologies to the handful of USA citizens I count among my friends, but your land of milk, honey, and Taco Bell is fast turning into the butt of every joke in the world. If it wasn't for your military might, naturally.
'Merica is like the unpopular, uncultured kid who borrows a hundred bucks from you and then uses the money to buy a gun. Then uses force of arms to refuse to repay you when you politely inquire about your money being returned. It's actually genius.
We've allowed ourselves to be completely regulated by their cheap imitation of Western culture. Rammstein was right. Hollywood is the new NATO. And the masses follow blindly, faith in the stars never questioned. It's the new astrology. With tits 'n' glitter.
Also, come to think of it, the world missed a trick. America and Australia remain the only 2 economically strong countries in the world that are still basically English colonies. How come no one ever put pressure on them to relinquish their illegal occupation of a foreign land that was already inhabited? Oh, I know the Native Americans didn't have a flag, but all the other countries where gin is available have been given back. At least these still play cricket. And of course, no one gives a fuck about Australia, it's a penal colony and a refuge for expat Saffers. You just have to look at the indigenous wild life to realise something is rotten in the state of Den-Maaaahk!

Anyway, back to America. I have a question. Do the citizens not care about the war crimes being committed on their behalf? Or are they not aware of these humanitarian atrocities? Or is it simply a case of being satisfied that their interests are being taken care of?

But I have news for all you so called educated commentators. In the same way you condemn the corporate owned media for blanketing the world's population with a soft comfy layer of bullshit, distracting them from the empire state building going on (see what I did there?), they also have to admit that some of the more elaborate conspiracy theories are also a little hard to swallow. Especially since the world's foremost cross-border intelligence is now expressed through baseless memes.

It goes one step further though. You, and I'm looking at YOU, need to make sure your own shit is in order before pointing any fingers. Who of you has never done something wrong? Let he who is without sin cast the first stone and people who live in glass houses shouldn't make home porn. Or something.

Am I rambling? It sounds like I'm rambling.

I say let the motherfuckers eat themselves to death. Failing that, perhaps the best course of action is to ignore the bastards and turn our attention to sustainable fuel sources instead of playing into the grabbing hand by remaining so direly dependent on their precious fossil fuels.

Basically all this flashed through my head as I filled up at Engen yesterday, so forgive me if it isn't very well constructed.

At least they gave us SLAYER, muscle cars, Tom Cruise, The Golden Girls, HD porn and Barney Stinson.

NGDG: "Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream." George W Bush

Spread The Love. Legen... Wait For It....  Dary!

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