Friday, November 11, 2011

DEAR SANTA

Please do not fill my stocking, or anything else, with THAT...

Welcome to your weekly (weakly?) dose of irreverence. My humblest apologies to the 3 entire people on the planet that missed me yesterday. It was a disaster! I had to work. I tell you, I don't know what the world is coming to.

Ok. I'm totally lying. I was engrossed in the most enthralling game of cricket ever. Well, in the last century at any rate. Jeesh, what drama! And smashed just about every negative record as well. Who said cricket was boring? And then we wrapped it up with aplomb this morning. I particularly like all the very civil and polite handshaking and butt patting afterwards, when you know they're going to disappear into their changing room and be like "Ja! Fuck you, you fucking Aussies! We 'wys'ed you your ma se ding! Whaaaalah!"

Anyway. Tonight sees an interesting event at the Jolly Roger. The band with the coolest name in South Africa, Sex Cauldron, are playing a set of what is, according to reports, some nice sleazy, sludgy, smug sex-rock. And speaking of all things rock 'n' roll, Ramfest has released pricing for their different shows around the country. Cape Town will set you back a very well spent R350, considering you get In Flames and some top local acts in the package. Cue the hordes of spoilt, lazy, good-for-nothing loser wank-fest students to complain at length. To the detractors: Please! Please! Please! Do not buy a ticket. There are more than enough people who want to. And I can only afford mine at the end of the month, as I have a bond and a life. Then rub one out and take along hard look at your sex life and the non-existent options with which to improve it. kthnxbye.

And on that irreverent note, let's look in on Reverend Irreverent
NGDG: "Is Census 2012 over then? I wasn't counted. Guess that gives me a few hours' grace to get to the border when President Malema orders the massacre of the whiteys."

Spread The Love. Make Sure To Stretch Before Using Any Heavy Machinery.

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