IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO THE EYES OF A DUCK.

No reason. Just because. Sure it'll piss some folks off.

OR

The REAL reason anyone goes to Trance Parties.

OR

What politicians and financial institutions see when looking from their ivory towers at their constituents.

Or something similar. That soul vacuum feeling. Not the "hey my soul hase been hoovered clean" feeling, the one where your entire essence has been deposited down a black hole without any hope of retrieval.
Perhaps I should write a song...

Ag, it's not that bad, before you start dialling emergency numbers. Not that it'll do you any good in this forsaken fucking place. And by this place I am rapidly expanding my definition beyond the borders of our beloved republic. At least we can still joke about how fucking useless everything is. Imagine living on the banks of the Ganges, or even worse, the Potomac...

I blame Endemol. Look what they started. Who needs barcodes?

Anyway, you probably want to hear about my exercise routine and how much I had to drink. Yes, and yes. Although the former is becoming increasingly easy to imagine with the aid of a rocket-driven zimmer frame.
But I will tell you this...

This weekend is a very special weekend indeed. This weekend I jet-set off to The Big Shitty (with Alphaville blasting in my ears...) to attend the most auspicious occasion this year. Yes folks, The Meyodies are tying the knot! The Meyer Of Awesomeville is going to "enhance his awesome" by wedding the lovely (as in "you lucky, lucky bastard!") Lady Lissa. It is an event that has been perched at the pinnacle of the social calender for months and I can't wait. Also, I get to rub shoulders with, like, total celebs n shit. Neal Goldwyer will be in attendance, making the potential merriment factor at the bar inconceivable. Anyone remember the blonde bassist that continually stole the show playing Awakening gigs? I'm pretty sure she's invited. And a whole host of other important people.

And speaking of important people, I also get to see DrHellCuz while I'm up there. And TSAR. And the cherry on the top is my stay at Hotel Real Life Smiley Face! Can't wait to see if there are mints on the pillows... [Translation: beer in fridge - actually I know that's already taken care of - probably in glorious abundance] Damn! This is going to be one awesome weekend! Only downside is I can't take The Hot Girlfriend along... But in the interest of passing exams and securing a degree which will go a long way towards my early retirement, I am prepared to make the ultimate sacrifice.

Tonight, everyone who fancies themselves a wee bit of a guitar slinger is gathering at Zula to enthuse over, and be mesmerised by, Tosin Abasi. Apparently he is some sort of 8-string guitar virtuoso and plays for something called Animals As Leaders. If I go, people will assume I'm at least competent enough to want to improve my playing and take me seriously. Here's hoping...

Anyway, another day, another death. I can't wait to get home and put my feet up and enjoy a beer. We'll see from there...

NGDG: Some Malawian robbed the shit out of a Dainfern teenager and the Cash Converters was full of rad new PS3 games for next to nothing. I couldn't decide so I bought one with the tanks spewing fire at a trench of nips.

Spread The Love. Julius Malema Needs YOUR Money To Appropriate YOUR Land.