THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY...

I'm back.

To tell you a story of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly...

Naturally we start with THE GOOD:

Black Celebration is happening tomorrow night. At Mercury Live. It's a Comunik party and features the legendary talents of DJ Reanimator and DJ Morkhans on the decks. Guaran-damn-teed heaving mass of bouncing, sweaty bodies having the collective time of their lives! And I'm not even talking about GangBang 5 - The Movie...

On top of aaaaaaaaall that (see what I did there?) you get to experience, yes EXPERIENCE, the might and wonder of AXXON. In full colour, 4D, HD and ear-bleeding surround motherfucking sound! We'll have your face, thank you.

Also, the surreal sorcerers of BlackMilk Productions will be there with a few tricks up their sleeves.

DO NOT MISS THIS! You will inevitably end up curled up in a corner crying as you shrivel up and die.

THE BAD: Tomorrow is National Braai Day. In the case of all the people who are fortunate enough to know TDB, it's been rechristened National Braam Day. We braai. It's tradition. Looking forward to seeing friends from all parts gathered to celebrate this auspicious occasion. It's gonna be bad!

THE UGLY: I have too many options here. Those of you that know, know, so I won't bore anyone. I will however tell you a little story of the cruelty I was unfortunate to witness this morning. A labourer on the back of a construction truck was very insistently calling a newspaper seller guy over indicating that he should hurry up to make a sale. Upon running his arse off and dodging traffic, as he got to the truck the labourer told him to fuck off and had a good laugh at this poor guy's expense with his buddies. Utter bastard! I hope he has a good laugh at his oh so clever self and slips in concentration at that moment someone flings a brick at him today.

As with the rest of the week, Dr Bob's revelation is probably best left unpublished. Neal Goldwyer on the other hand, has this to say: "There's a new Muppets movie! The Muppets' Christmas Carrol is the only movie I've ever cried in. Well, that, and anything about the Holocaust. The Muppets' Holocaust. There's an Oscar for best drama right there."

Spread The Love. It Works. In Mysterious Ways. I'm Told. Fuck It.