Thursday, April 11, 2013


"Black Spell Of Destruction" she wrote.

Tonight I cook my first Vegan meal. Impressed? Don't be. The minute it's done, I'm lobbing in shit loads of strips of chicken. Only one of the dinner guests is Vegan. Why should the rest of us have to suffer? Plants sustain life on our planet. Plants provide us with shelter. They rejuvenate and protect. All animals ever did for us was taste good and provide us with fleeting companionship before ripping our hearts out by passing on. I think the Vegans have it wrong...

Anyway, before I start something here on the interweblands (I don't like cats, so there's very little else on the Internet to do), let us move on. Today I am having one of those fucking days. Work is making me grind my fucking teeth and I'm on the verge of doing someone grievous bodily harm. It has so far taken all my will and strength to refrain from punching or throttling this particular individual.

But then this chap came along. There's really not much you can keep welled up or in a tight little ball of fury when you're almost wetting your pants from sheer, unrelenting, gut-busting laughter. Or as the kids would say "LOL"... I have now watched it a few times and each time it gets funnier. And each time my bladder is under increasingly severe pressure. Not only that, but LordDoom used his photoshop skillz to create a laughably scary caricature combining Burzum's Varg Vikernes with our very own Prez 4 Lifebouy, the (very un) honourable Jacob Zuma...

We're calling it a Burzuma.

See above if you don't believe me.

Half pining for the fjords, half burying our beautiful country in a fetid sceptic tank of shame.

Unfortunately I am going to have to cut it short for today. The little muscles under my eye are starting to twitch and I'm fighting to maintain control of all the other muscles - especially those involved in kicking the shit out of annoying motherfuckers that won't leave me alone.

NGDG: Snoop Dogg's change of name to Snoop Lion reminds me of that old joke, grown up, deciding to adopt a more mature moniker: Boy Clive.

Spread The Love. Save The Defenceless Plants!

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